My Music Crushes: Past & Present, For Better or For Worse

Joey was my first. I slept with him (sleeping bag), bathed with him (towel), played with him (action figure), watched his videos, cried when he sang “Please Don’t Go Girl.” My 10th birthday was even New Kids on the Block themed (see attached picture). Embarrassingly Joey hung tough in my heart many years after it was appropriate.

My mom once told me that you could always tell what a girl was like by the Beatle she thought was the cutest. When I asked her what it meant that I thought Ringo was the cutest she said, “Weird” and she paused and finished, “You like weirdo druggies.” Hmmmmm. Sometimes momma ain’t far off the mark. History has proven that I do like weirdo druggies in real life and on stage but dammit if Ringo isn’t adorable with his big nose and his shaggy mop in A Hard Day’s Night and anyway mom is a goody goody who likes Paul McCartney.

So maybe I have a thing for dark curly hair, or Italians, or drummers, or Italian drummers with dark curly hair. Wow! Fabrizio had it all. We even went to the Grand Canyon together (no those are not cut and paste marks!). Alas, even though I drove two hours to see The Strokes in concert, almost waited out back with some girls from Mississippi who had already made out with Albert, I could not catch Fabrizio’s eye or win his heart like I had hoped. He soon got together with Drew Barrymore and my love for him died a quick death.

Do I need to even defend this? Look at this picture. No, no I don’t. The picture is enough. I would wear an astronaut outfit to be near him any day.

Quirky, adorable, sensitive and prolific. What more could a girl want? His voice is sweet and his lyrics are beautiful. I listened to him almost solely for an entire year. I once thought I saw him on the L train but I couldn’t decide whether to pounce or not. Whoever it was, though, sure got tired of me staring.

Dylan was my early college crush. In his younger years he was so earnest and plain spoken with his sly smile and beat up guitar. I imagined myself as devoted as Joan Baez – following him around with a cigarette and my guitar waiting to break out into a beautiful melody. How jealous I was not to have been born then. But maybe it was lucky. I could still have a rap sheet for stalking.

O.k., o.k. I know this one is a little suspect. But think back to the early ’90’s and imagine yourself in junior high. There was Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Smashing Pumpkins etc…and while I loved listening to the music, those guys were a little too dangerous for me. August and Everything After was and is one of my all time favorite albums and early 90’s Duritz was every sensitive thing I wanted topped off with dreads.

O.k. this one is suspect too. He is pretentious. Full of himself. Annoying. Croony. And I’ll put money down it would get boring listening to him drone on and on about himself. But the boy is cute! Even with his lame tattoos and the way he scrunches his face all around when he plays the guitar. But watch “Your Body is a Wonderland” and tell me you wouldn’t want him to wonderland you. And honestly, Continuum isn’t that bad of an album…moving on quickly!

Yes, Johnny Cash is pretty sexy – but Joaquin as Johnny just blew the screen away. All in black with his sexy curve weird lip thing. Reese Witherspoon was a strong woman to be able to walk away again and again. I would have just signed up for the heroin addiction and moved right on in.

This crush is more based on the music than pure physical attraction. I think everything that Isaac Brock writes is brilliant and damn near perfect. Smart is sexy.